I've been trying to decide what we are going to do with gift giving between the kiddos. I'd like them to give each other and us gifts so that they aren't just doing all of the receiving. This year they don't really have any money of their own (except for Rae who has some money from winning a contest and from the "tooth fairy" - ack, I need to blog about that). I think I'll just take Rae and Blaise shopping and let them pick out some small items and find a few things to be from Isaac - but of course that doesn't really teach them anything about sacrifice and using hard-earned money to buy things for other people. SO, my goal for the new year is to set up some sort of allowance system so that they learn to save money for toys they may want in the middle of the year and also saving money to buy gifts for people.
My questions for you:
How do your kids earn allowance and how much do they earn? After tithing what do they get to do with it?
Do your kids give each other gifts for birthdays/Christmas?
Answer my questions and I'll get back to blogging regularly ;)
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Obviously I don't have any advice on this, but I am interested to see what others say... Last year during tithing settlement our Bishop suggested we start giving lily allowance so she could learn about tithing. I thought she was a little too young to understand, but I think we'll start with the new year. She needs more responsibility anyway. For this year maybe they could learn sacrifice by having to give away a small toy to charity or "selling" one to you in order to get money to buy a gift for eachother.
Neither Elizabeth or Amelia really have much of a concept of money at this point...it's starting to come, but barely. Mostly they see money as something to put in their piggy banks. I'm sure the fact that we mostly use the debit card has something to do with that. Anyway, I'm not worried about connecting gifts and money at this point. I'm just picking up small things here and there and putting them in my gift box and I'll let them help wrap the ones that are "from" them. I expect Elizabeth to catch on to money in the next year (and that usually means Amelia joins in parroting whatever Elizabeth says) so that'll probably change, but it's enough for now.
I'm not really worried about them learning about giving...any time I ask what they could give someone (like for Daddy's birthday last month) they are anxious to give whatever they love most at the moment (like the dolls/animals they sleep with).
I haven't made any decisions about allowance yet. For birthdays / Christmas I let them pick up a small present, wrap it, and give it to each other. But let me know what you do so I know what to do next year!
My kids don't get a set allowance because we all help around the house because it is part of being in a family. What I do instead is money jars with their names on it. I drop a few coins when I see them doing a good job, like not complaining when they are asked to do things or if they go above and beyond. We also have list of money jobs, things they can do that I never quite get to and need to get done. Every so often we'll empty the jars and everyone pays tithing and then decides what to do with the money. I encourage them to save it and spend it wisely. But sometimes they have to learn the hard way how quickly it disappears.
As for gifts between siblings, sometime if they have money we'll take them shopping. I encourage them to make something instead. They get really creative by painting, making books or other little things with craft supplies we have around.
My sil takes each of her kids to the dollar store to shop for other family members. She makes it a little date each one and then helps them wrap everything. I like that idea because it helps to limit spending.
we were never successful with allowances... but we had "pay jobs" where the kids could earn money... mostly to learn about tithing and budgeting. we used to take the kids to the dollar store and they would choose gifts for each other---the idea being to teach them to think about what the other person might want---not what they want!
Awhile ago we assigned the kids chores and said they would get a dollar a week if they did them. Yeah, we have not kept up with it at all. We do let them earn money here and there by helping around the house, and they almost always use the money at the dollar store. We have been letting Gabe collect change around the house (since we don't use cash much, there isn't much of it). I planned this year to have them go to the dollar store and pick something out for each other.
So, I didn't even know you were pregnant until your FB post today! Congrats!!!!
I read this book called "The Parenting Breakthrough: Teaching Your Children to Be Independent" (or something like that and it had a very detailed section about allowances and finances. It's a fantastic book. The author is LDS and Boyack is her last name. I think her "plan" is pretty good. It's geared towards slightly older children, but you could adapt it. Otherwise, I think I would just help my kids make some kind of craft for the other people. Jakob loves crafts and at his age I think that would be pretty meaningful. But check out that book for some good answers.
We put everyone's name in a bowl twice and each person picks two names. Then we take them to the dollar store and we have them pick a gift for those two siblings plus their primary teacher. If the child has money they are more than willing to spend it. If not, then we just pay for it. The kids are so happy to be able to pick out what they want for the person whose name they drew.
One year we did a giving jar. Each child was asked to donate $1 a month to the jar by doing extra chores or sacrificing some of their birthday money. Then in December we took all the money in the jar and bought gifts for kids off of a giving tree. The kids LOVED it and they never wanted to miss a month to pay their dollar to the jar.
I think tithing comes by example and hearing our testimony of it. I think that giving children money just to teach them tithing doesn't teach them much at all. I'm of the philosophy that children are part of a family and household work is part of being a family. I really encourage our kids to do extra chores for minimal amounts of money and, since my kids are a little older, doing chores for neighbors and friends.
But in my opinion you have to do what works for your family and don't be afraid to try different things. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. And sometime in the future, like when you become a grandma, you'll have it all figured out!!
Merry Christmas!
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